Dean would have sworn on everything he'd ever loved that he'd had no idea it would have even occurred to Castiel to want to do this. And then in an instant it seemed ludicrous that he couldn't have known; so many things fell into place that Dean felt like an idiot for not realizing it before. "Cas...."
"I wanted you to kiss me that night before we faced Raphael," Cas said, his voice shaking and fragile. "Do you remember, Dean?" Dean flashed back to laughing his ass off outside that brothel, clapping one arm around Cas' shoulders. He remembered Cas had smiled at him and Dean didn't understand why he hadn't grabbed Cas by that stupid coat of his and kissed him then and there. "Why didn't you kiss me then?"
Dean shushed him gently, brushing his sodden hair out of his eyes. "I'm sorry, man," Dean whispered, pressing a light kiss to his lips. "I didn't know, Cas, swear to God I didn't." Cas shivered and Dean pulled him closer, running his hands over Cas' bare arms to try to warm him up. "I didn't know," he repeated before before kissing him again, long and slow and deep this time. Cas opened to the kiss like a drowning man finding a breath of air, his hands in Dean's hair and trying to get under his clothes; Dean tasted rain and booze and the bitter tang of pills.
"I missed you," Cas whispered between breaths. "I missed this and I missed you. I wish you were still you." Dean made soothing sounds as Cas shook against him; he slid one hand past Cas' waistband and over his too-sharp hipbone, wondering if Cas had always been this thin under all those clothes. "I missed you and you're leaving again."
"Shh," Dean said, kissing him to cut that off. "I'm here now, okay? I'm here right now." Cas nodded, nipping at Dean's lower lip and moaning as Dean brushed his hand over his ribs. Dean let Cas pull him down into the mud, Cas pressing against him like the world would end if this stopped. Dean slid Cas' shirt up and kissed his way up his stomach, feeling Cas arch up and writhe beneath him. Dean couldn't fix any of this. He couldn't change his other self back to being human instead of a tin soldier, he couldn't bring back Sam or fix this world or put Cas back together from the broken thing he'd become.
The rain was cold against his bare skin as Cas pulled his shirt up and off, discarding it into the mud. Dean couldn't fix it but he could make it better. Cas shuddered and groaned as Dean kissed his neck, his hands tight in Dean's hair as Dean sucked on the wet skin at the hollow of his throat. He felt the vibration as Cas whispered his name over and over, Dean, Dean, Dean.
For just a little while, Dean knew he could make this better.
Re: Dean/5.04!Cas - Gone Too Long 2/2
"I wanted you to kiss me that night before we faced Raphael," Cas said, his voice shaking and fragile. "Do you remember, Dean?" Dean flashed back to laughing his ass off outside that brothel, clapping one arm around Cas' shoulders. He remembered Cas had smiled at him and Dean didn't understand why he hadn't grabbed Cas by that stupid coat of his and kissed him then and there. "Why didn't you kiss me then?"
Dean shushed him gently, brushing his sodden hair out of his eyes. "I'm sorry, man," Dean whispered, pressing a light kiss to his lips. "I didn't know, Cas, swear to God I didn't." Cas shivered and Dean pulled him closer, running his hands over Cas' bare arms to try to warm him up. "I didn't know," he repeated before before kissing him again, long and slow and deep this time. Cas opened to the kiss like a drowning man finding a breath of air, his hands in Dean's hair and trying to get under his clothes; Dean tasted rain and booze and the bitter tang of pills.
"I missed you," Cas whispered between breaths. "I missed this and I missed you. I wish you were still you." Dean made soothing sounds as Cas shook against him; he slid one hand past Cas' waistband and over his too-sharp hipbone, wondering if Cas had always been this thin under all those clothes. "I missed you and you're leaving again."
"Shh," Dean said, kissing him to cut that off. "I'm here now, okay? I'm here right now." Cas nodded, nipping at Dean's lower lip and moaning as Dean brushed his hand over his ribs. Dean let Cas pull him down into the mud, Cas pressing against him like the world would end if this stopped. Dean slid Cas' shirt up and kissed his way up his stomach, feeling Cas arch up and writhe beneath him. Dean couldn't fix any of this. He couldn't change his other self back to being human instead of a tin soldier, he couldn't bring back Sam or fix this world or put Cas back together from the broken thing he'd become.
The rain was cold against his bare skin as Cas pulled his shirt up and off, discarding it into the mud. Dean couldn't fix it but he could make it better. Cas shuddered and groaned as Dean kissed his neck, his hands tight in Dean's hair as Dean sucked on the wet skin at the hollow of his throat. He felt the vibration as Cas whispered his name over and over, Dean, Dean, Dean.
For just a little while, Dean knew he could make this better.